My Brother Bill is a Fireman Bold

Fireman at Work

Fireman at Work

A Poem

My brother Bill is a fireman bold
He pits oot fires*
Though he is only forty four and a half years old
He pits oot fires
He went out to a fire one night
Someone shouted DYNAMITE!!!!
But wherever he is he’ll be all right
Because
He pits oot fires

Translation and Explanatory Notes
*pits oot = puts out
An essential part of a fireman’s function is the extinguishing of conflagrations.
This is secondary only to his primary duty which, obviously, is to rescue precious wee kitty cats who get stuck up trees.
Diligent research has not yet revealed whether this is as frequent an occurrence as children’s books and TV shows suggest.

DYNAMITE!!! The use of capital letters and exclamation marks indicates the level of concern displayed at the discovery of explosive materials in an already inflammatory situation.

Wherever he is – There are two generally accepted options here for his final destination
He is either sitting on a wee fluffy cloud strumming cheerfully on a harp or
He is in a not-so-nice burny place where he is equally unperturbed because, as discussed above, his professional training ideally equips him to handle just such a situation.

Audible Excitement
AnElephant now does a reading of this delightful poem, which he believes to be a traditional rhyme with no copyright.
If this is not the case he is of course happy to acknowledge his mistake and give credit where due.

Notes, Disclaimers and other General Comments:
1. AnElephant’s brother is not called Bill.
2. AnElephant’s brother is not a Fireman, bold or otherwise. This is not intended in any way to cast aspersions on his boldness, bravery or courage, because if he was indeed a Fireman, AnElephant is quite sure he would be jolly bold.
3. AnElephant’s brother is not forty four and a half years old.
AnElephant fibbed about that to conceal his own age.
Which is a scarily big number between 6 and 1 million.
4. No brother of AnElephant was injured in the production of this post.
5. He has, to AnElephant’s knowledge, never been blown up by DYNAMITE!!!

About AnElephantCant

An artist/writer/poet combination whose blogs reflect an approach to life that celebrates nature and takes a tongue-in-cheek view of most issues. So you get rhymes and doodles, photographs and comment. Irreverent and irrelevant. Occasionally funny, sometimes serious, mostly pointless. https://anelephantcant.me/
This entry was posted in Daft Rhymes, humour and tagged , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

18 Responses to My Brother Bill is a Fireman Bold

  1. Sarah Ann says:

    Really enjoyed the poem, but your explanations had me laughing more. The photo’s lovely too. An all round feel-good post. 🙂

    Like

  2. julespaige says:

    Dear Elephant –
    My guys and one gal too are volunteers here in the States where 80% of all who ‘pits oot fires’ – don’t get paid. I’m going to have to copy this and post it at the fire house! Or at the very least show it to my crew. Our little one under three has quite a toy collection of fire vehicles and can tell you the names of the different trucks too!

    Like

    • AnElephantCant hide his embarrassment
      He tries to shelter behind his wee nose
      He wants to advise
      All your gals and guys
      That we all know they are the real heroes

      Like

      • julespaige says:

        Volunteer firefighters only do what is just and true
        Expecting only that you too would do too
        Perhaps in a different occupation
        To help those of each and every nation –
        They’ll all say they just love what they do.

        Not to be put in halls of fame
        Just to put out an unruly flame
        Or save a kitty stuck in a tree
        Assist medics with some medical need
        An everyday Jack or Jill, different, but too – just the same

        Like

  3. colonialist says:

    My own brother he does it better,
    When to every fire he goes,
    And he gets each blaze even wetter,
    Plus, he has his own built-in hose!

    Like

  4. Penny L Howe says:

    Great Post, I enjoyed each element of your piece. The written words, the humour of it all. And of course a photo of the worlds best fireman! Thank you, your wit is excellent! 🙂 xx

    Like

  5. Shreyank says:

    AnElephants notes and disclaimers where hilarious ! 🙂

    Like

  6. Alastair says:

    AnElephant has create a wonderful post
    One that couldn’t have been tamer
    I’m sure with his pose
    he could use his trunk as a hose
    But I seriously love the disclaimer

    Like

  7. emmylgant says:

    The little fellow is adorable.
    Putting out fires is admirable
    And the reading with the poem
    Is quite lovely and jolly. A gem

    Like

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