Splintered Thoughts on Winter Sports

Winter Sports by Phil Burns

Winter Sports by Phil Burns

AnElephantCant take part in Winter Sports
Although some ladies outfits do look rather nice
But what his complaint here is
They look rather dangerous
AnElephantCant skate on thin ice

Ski jumping is the craziest activity
Of this there is clearly no doubting
Does a chap wake up one day
Look around him and say
I think I’ll go leap off the side of a mountain

Downhill skiing can also be painful
Though less suicidal than that one maniacal high leap
But it does seem at least
You are quite close to the piste
So when you prang you probably end up in just one big heap

Cross-country skiing looks too much like hard work
Although Scandinavians travel miles with no fuss
AnElephant says no way
He moves far too slowly
If he wants to go that far he prefers to hop on a bus

AnElephantCant even spell tobogganing
He has palpitations at the thought of bobsleighing
His bum is too huge
To fit on a luge
And when he is steering a sled it just refuses to obey him

Ice Dancing is too graceful for a pachyderm
Ice Hockey looks scarily dire
So when things start to freeze
He stifles a sneeze
And wraps up with a cup of hot chocolate in front of a roaring log fire

About AnElephantCant

An artist/writer/poet combination whose blogs reflect an approach to life that celebrates nature and takes a tongue-in-cheek view of most issues. So you get rhymes and doodles, photographs and comment. Irreverent and irrelevant. Occasionally funny, sometimes serious, mostly pointless. https://anelephantcant.me/
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8 Responses to Splintered Thoughts on Winter Sports

  1. emmylgant says:

    This is hugely fun. Thank you for the link back!
    I love the second verse! That sounds so much like you!
    I believe I was in Aix when you posted this and so I missed it altogether…

    Like

  2. Pingback: Tourists – Sunday Photo Fiction | anelephantcant

  3. RoSy says:

    That cup of hot chocolate sounds good right about now.

    Like

  4. Adrian B says:

    AnElephant can enjoy all of them by watching his loves one to do them. and of course drinking his hot chocolate. 🙂 Just try them those bruises will go away in the summer.

    Like

  5. Anja says:

    awww I love the red birdies in the drawing. 🙂
    I would have to agree with AnElephant…I would rather be warm by a fire and just watch the icy activities on tv.

    Like

  6. I suggest a nice soft lounge, a pair of warm slippers and a favourite drink in front of the tele. You can’t get killed there, unless the roof falls in. Very thought provoking dear Sir Elephant.

    Like

  7. Al says:

    Better to be warm and cosy
    Than cold and freezy.

    Like

  8. Esther says:

    AnElephant can use a sledge 🙂

    Like

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